Raybo – Empire Mercenary

What do you get when you have two Gorn, two Klingons and a Human on an away team to retrieve data for an Orion Syndicate working for the Klingon Empire? Well, not only is it a good opening for a joke but you also have my current, somewhat interesting situation. The exact circumstance of how a Human, like me, ended up with colleagues such as these might seem odd to you, but in fact, it’s not odd at all. You see, these guys are my coworkers and friends — or at least, the closest thing I can call friends in this crazy universe.

My name is Raymond Bocheaux and I am a mercenary. Actually, the term mercenary, while being alluring and mysterious, at the same time, is also something that will get you into trouble if you throw it around in mixed company. By mixed, I mean groups and gatherings that might have the Federation types skulking about within it. So, you can call me a professional contractor if you want.

I am not one of those humans that find disdain for the Federation or anything like that. You see, I work for those that pay me and my loyalties follow the latinum, the gold pressed variety. Also, my home planet of Earth doesn’t find much use for wealth but out here in the other worlds — especially in the Klingon and Romulan empires – money keeps you happy and I like to be happy. The Federation has a problem with that though and I hear that I am wanted for “collusion with the enemy” or some such. I don’t particularly worry about that though since I have nothing back on Earth pulling me in that direction.  The Federation’s reach out here is not troublesome at all. I think some of my crew-mates on the ship are jealous though, they want to have bounties on them too – so that make me a little bit of a “Rock Star” on the ship.

“Raybo, you are on the point,” a tall, slender Gorn hissed followed by a computer generated voice. “Right, I got point,” I replied – patting my portable universal translator knowing that it tries its best. I am slowly picking up on some other languages used on my ship but since we have a Gorn commander, everything is officially spoken in Gorn. Though the Klingons and Orions, along with about a dozen other species use their native tongue when off duty. We all use these portable translators though and they can be quite interesting sometimes.

I nod in his general direction on throw my patented thumbs up with cocked head and grin. He snorts and turns back to his tactical kit.

Raybo is what they call me. For some reason, nobody calls me Ray and my mama is the only person who called me Raymond. Everyone certainly has problems pronouncing my last name, so a contraction was born of necessity and Raybo became the replacement for Ray Bocheaux. Yep, I am one of those Bocheaux’s from Gautier, Mississippii but then, you probably don’t really care.

I haven’t always been a combative soldier type, it sorta grew out of a requirement for my job back when I was working for the Federation. I was an exozoologist and spent a great deal of time exploring the galaxy in search of new life forms and collecting samples and specimens as part of these studies. Over time and after several close missions where the small critters would either have bad temperaments or lots of friends that didn’t particularly take to poking and prodding of their kin, I got pretty good at reacting to situations where force was needed. Over time, I got real good at it. Today, I find myself doing it for a living and with my science background, it makes me welcomed to various factions that need experience and have the latinum to pay me.

I checked the safety on my Assault Gun, not like there was one that really worked but I adjusted it and hoped that I didn’t vaporize anyone if I held it too tight. The thing was big, bulky but not very heavy but it did require respect. Normally, I would be happy with a standard Disruptor, but I was on away teams with Klingons and Gorn and they had big guns too, they all considered me as the weaker species.   I pretty much was, but wasn’t planning on showing them anything to support that idea.

This group that I was in was the same group of folks that I had operated with for quite a while. Seeya or S’Yaahish – Seeya is my name for him and he likes it – is our captain and carries a rank within the Klingon Empire as General or something. However, he’s probably the best commander that I have ever had in my time associated with any military organization. He’s mean as a snake but fair and knows his way around a tactical situation.

Betty, or B’Etara is our medical officer and one hell of a Klingon sharpshooter. She’s not bad on the eyes either, if you’re in to Klingons that is. It’s just hard to tell when she’s being flirtatious or taunting to rip your eyeballs out through your rear-end. She’s a hoot.

Mel, or M’Rel is her brother and he’s just a brute. He’s a nice guy for a Klingon but damn near impossible to tell a joke to. He’s one of the lead Engineers on the ship but on these away teams, he is a 7-foot tall gadget geek that will remove your limbs while singing Klingon folks songs with a smile on his face. A scary dude but I call him a friend.

Then there’s Tash, or Talash as he’s known, who’s a real prick. He’s the Bridge Tactical Officer when on the ship but on away teams, he’s our second in command. A Gorn like Seeya, he’s just normally an uptight, in-your-face, scaley, mouse eating lizard man that I would rather accidentally shoot than talk to. However, he is good at what he does and in a fight, he will kick ass on anything standing or mobile.

We, as a group, gathered in a tactical circle in the weapons locker on our ship, the I.K.S. Orongvo – yes, it’s really an Imperial Klingon Ship and a Bird of Prey at that. Seems that Seeya has a couple of these ships, all given to him by the Empire for services rendered and since our missions are “spooky” – even for Klingon standards – the Bird of Prey is perfect for quick “in and outs” to the galactic hotspots.

Seeya points at Tash, who nods. Then points at each of the other members of the away team, Betty, Mel and then me. We all nod. As Seeya reaches for his transporter controls on his upper arm, we all do the same – waiting for him to go first. I wonder what’s waiting for us this time. I should have hit the head first.